Thursday, July 2, 2009

Chewing Nails Turns Philosophical

I've chewed my nails since I was a kid. Sometimes I really wish I could stop. I'm better than I used to be... I mean, I'm conscience of it, so I can purposely tell myself not to bite my nails in public. But then, when I'm alone (or with Katie)... gnaw gnaw gnaw... then scrape scrape scrape (to even out the nail like sandpaper). My mom chewed her nails. Then, one day, she decided she wanted to stop. So she had her nails "done". It worked. It was her "reward" to herself for stopping. My guess is that the plastic just wasn't as satisfying. Alas, I will not be having my nails "done". Nope. Wow, that would look funny on me. Maybe not. Maybe it would look awesome. French manicure, perhaps. I mean, really, how do I know I’d look funny? Am I limiting myself due to personalized stereotypes about myself to myself? Whoa. I think I am. But also, I know I will not be having my nails “done”.

Yeah, that’s right.

In summary, Noam Chomsky is brilliant. Why don't the brilliant people rule the world? Seriously. I think world leaders should be subject to IQ tests before they are allowed to claw themselves to the top. AND compassion tests. Damn it.


  1. High-larry-us! I chewed my nails until second grade. After a beloved teacher asked my best friend to join her at the front of the class to celebrate the end of my best friend's nail-biting reign, I stopped. I *so* wanted the perceived fame and glory that my brain connected to the cessation of nail biting. Ha! Soon after ending this compulsion, I began other anxiety-driven behaviors. Wow... what an inspiring success story! I've noticed that you tend to bite those babies o' yours when we're watching intense movies, during a decision-making process, preparing to do something you/we don't want to do, and when you're bored. Yeah, so that pretty much sums up LIFE. I can visualize us with our nails all "done" and fancy, but it's an odd (disturbing even) image. I might do it if double-dawg-dared. Prolly not. I usually cut my nails so short I'm sure most assume I bite them. Your hands and nails are lovely, my dear. You've mentioned before that you like your hands in all their ruggedness because they look like your mom's hands before her fancy nail era. Think about it... you've made your hands a living tribute to her. You know that your hands will look like hers in any nearly state of wear or care. A manicure wouldn't change this resemblance. If I can do anything to help, please tell me. I'm always willing to distract (or refocus?) you. In summary, I love you... nubby nails and all!

  2. Hi Katie, my dear. Thank you for the comment. I hear that's the deepest blogger desire... comments. Your story was wonderful... although I think perhaps it would have been best to keep biting??? Thank you for your insights. Very much so. A joy to read. I'm pretty sure (I think) this post wasn't a cry for help, but I appreciate your offer and attention! And I love you. So flippin' much. BTW, I added a summary, cuz, you know, why ever did those stop??