Saturday, April 4, 2009

Pants... Shopping... Sadness

So... the other night I went shopping. Not something I like to do. Not something I do often (except for food). I needed pants. Badly. My current pair was hurting my belly. Badly. So... I went to a store... that sells pants. The employee to customer ratio was about 4:1. Point being, it was not busy, at all. Which is a good thing 'cuz it was beautiful outside. AND, I like to avoid people. Unless I'm in performance mode. But that's another story... So I tried to find some pants in the clearance section... and of course, there's a woman shopping nearby. She starts heading my direction and says, "Can I get by, big guy?" Okay... so I have a hard time speaking when people refer to me by the wrong gender. I'm a woman, with boobs. Obvious boobs. And my face looks like a woman's face. And yes, my hair IS short, but come on now!!! Plenty of women have short hair at this point AND mine isn't even buzzed right now! So I just laughed. Luckily, I didn't feel the anger I sometimes feel. That came later... so I kept shopping... wasn't going to let her destroy my mission. So THEN, she says "Hey, do you like this coat?" I didn't know she was talking to me. "Hey, this coat is a good deal! Do you like it?" I turned... and in my very-much-female voice said, "Uh, no, I have a coat." To which she replies, "We live in Ohio, you need more than one coat." And I say, "I'm fine, thanks." Okay, so I start to realize that she's an insane extrovert type... So I find a pair of pants and go to the dressing room. And THERE she is!! Sitting, waiting for her daughter. I try on the pants... look around a bit more... go to the checkout line... and THERE she is AGAIN! Classic. I flippin' hate shopping.

In summary, Katie keeps me sane. I would likely be dead without her. No joking. No exaggeration. Seriously. I consider it a happy statement.

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